Laura Petrie Was Infinitely More Empowered Than Cardi B

It’s as banal as any sitcom trope, but not nearly as funny: Another female singer has exposed herself in an X-rated performance to garner adulation and further her fame.

During this year’s Grammy Awards show, Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion performed their trashy hit “WAP” (Google it at your own risk), mouthing the song’s obscene lyrics while writhing together on a huge bed while mostly naked.

And, with the predictable timing of a sitcom laugh track, the fawning leftists broke in on cue with kudos for another “empowering” performance.

 “They gloriously twerked and strutted and owned the stage in Barbarella-esque outfits, referencing female empowerment, sexual pride, and delivering undoubtedly one of the most memorable Grammy performances of all time,” Chloe Melas at CNN Entertainment gushed.

I will freely admit I have not watched the performance in full because I’ve tried to keep my mind – and my browsing history – free of smut.

However, the short segments I saw on Twitter with the pair entwined along with a still of Cardi B’s mostly naked backside gave me the gist. The giant bed also assured me that I didn’t miss any nuance.

It’s not just that this smut passes for mainstream entertainment nowadays – we’re past that point – but that these debasing performances that are the epitome of objectification are exalted as the height of feminist expression by so many.

These women certainly have everyone talking about them and they’re seriously wealthy, but empowered? Not even close.

Sex and femininity are powerful forces, but when used the way porn stars and entertainers do, it gives the power to the viewer and not the viewed – and that’s why Laura Petrie is infinitely more empowered than Cardi B.

It’s no secret that I have a particular fondness for mid-century television and specifically its depiction of housewives.

One of my favorites still is “The Dick Van Dyke Show,” featuring the young, pretty, sweet-but-sharp Laura Petrie played by the adorable Mary Tyler Moore.

The show was funny, and Laura and her husband Rob were very much in love and oozed a mutual sexual attraction, Hays-code twin beds notwithstanding.

She was a housewife, but she was clearly in charge in a way that women always are when they exude charm and wholesome beauty in a loving marriage.

Rob gave Laura her way and took care of her because he loved and respected her, which she made easy in caring for him, their home, their child, and especially neighbors and guests.  

Feminists rail against women using their natural femininity to make their way in life as Laura would have, but they cheer on the Cardi B’s of the world who simply get naked and simulate sex with another female supposedly as an expression of strong womanhood.

If feminism is about women’s dignity and equality, then the one who has made herself an object for a man’s viewing pleasure – completely separate from any appreciation of that thong-clad woman as an individual – is antithetical to the idea.

Women who use their bodies in that way are literally treated as things instead of people no matter how much feminists insist otherwise.

They are consumed for the viewer’s pleasure, then tossed aside without a thought when the newest set of parts are put on display.

By contrast, a woman like Laura Petrie certainly would have been carnally appreciated by her husband, but he was invested in her as a person and a partner too.

That doesn’t mean there aren’t bad husbands who treat their wives like objects – or worse, seek out other women for that purpose – but marriage sets the framework that makes sex a package deal that comes with the whole woman.

Feminists may cast derision when Laura cried and appealed to her husband with a weepy “Oh, Rob!” but her needs and concerns never went unmet.

Laura was cherished, respected, loved, and empowered in her home as women married to good husbands always are.

Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion will only remain relevant as long as the viewer sees fit and until he moves onto the next thing to consume.

Entertainers like that will be clamoring for attention when they get too old to be the object of anyone’s desire (see Madonna), but nobody will care just the same.

It isn’t that women shouldn’t celebrate or embrace their sexuality, but they should express it in a setting like marriage that ensures care, love, and respect both inside and outside of the bedroom.

Laura Petrie had something special in those twin beds that Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion could never dream of on that massive mattress: True female empowerment that only marriage and family can bring.